Monday, July 23, 2012

Apocalypse Monday - Spoons

That's right, the utensil.  And while knives and forks will certainly have their place during the apocalypse, spoons will be even more useful than their cutlery brethren.  Here's why:


1) You know when you heard that ol' joke about digging a hole to China with a spoon?  There are days where this will be the only entertainment you have.  Enjoy it.


2) I was at the county fair once and saw an old man playing spoons like instruments.  Then he tried to sell me kettle corn.  When the zombies have all gone home for the day, you'll need to bring down your adrenaline level... a nice orchestra of spoons ought to do the trick.  And maybe, a bowl of kettle corn, too.


3) Eating oatmeal with your hands is just wrong, even when the undead are roaming free.  Use the spoons like a civilized human being.


4) Wind chimes create a homey feel to any survivor camp.  Since real wind chimes are only found at the abandoned Walgreens down the road, use some spoons to create a whimsical chime for your fellow survivors.


5) If you find some sleeping zombies and have nothing to kill them with, rap their knuckles with the spoons.  Of course, then you'll have to run like the dickens.


6) You can use the spoons to check your hair.  I mean, you'll be upside-down and all 'fun house mirror', but you should still make the effort.


7) Did you ever play that game where you hang the spoon off the edge of the table and put something on it... and then smack the handle and watch it fly?  You should not do this in front of children but it will be great fun during the apocalypse.


8) It's a sign of virility when men hang spoons off their noses.  If you find a potential mate in your travels, hand him a spoon and judge him accordingly.


9) You can use spoons and some rubber bands to make a catapult.  A really teeny catapult, but we do what we can during these dark times.


10) It's impossible to eat jell-o without a spoon.  And you can trust me on that, 'cause I've done the research.  Use the spoon and save yourself a mess.


Until next time survivors,

Thrifty Crafty Girl
I link up at these great parties!

3 comments:

  1. Another good survival item, thanks!!! **grins**

    ReplyDelete
  2. hahaha - You crack me up. My dad actually knows how to play spoons, but I never picked up that skill. I can't hang one from my nose, either, but since you've deemed it a masculine trait, I'll give up trying on that one.

    ReplyDelete
  3. No, I have never done #7 but now I desperately want to.

    ReplyDelete

I love all the comments I get from you! Because of an insane amount of spam, I had to turn off anonymous commenting but I'd love it if you'd comment anyway!

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